Laterally Stupid - Crocodile Tennis

I've seen some stupid advertisements in my time, and I've even written about a few of them on this site, but the recent Optus/Tennis Australia where two crocodiles play tennis by belting a sugar-glider (or possum) back and forth with their tails is probably the stupidest thing I've ever seen. And I've seen John Howard try to bowl.

I can't for the life of me imagine how on earth such an idea was ever allowed out of the surely drunken (or possibly stoned) mind in which it was first formed. It defies literal and symbolic interpretation. I know I'm possibly being a tad high-minded when I say this, but I don't think any animal would relish being a substitute for a ball, so I can't for the life of me see what there is to be gained by creating such imagery. Are we being urged to sympathise with the ball? Or are we being given the green light to find a decent-sized lizard and try to belt a willy-wagtail around with it? I just don't know.

I know you'd have to be pretty stupid to take an advertisement like this in so literal a fashion, but given its astonishing inanity, it's either going to be taken wrongly, or avoided like a bloke sniffing paint on a train.

I'm all for surreal advertisements, but this one has got me stumped. In no context whatsoever does animal cruelty work for me, even if the animated marsupial seems to be enjoying itself. So next time, I'd like to see an animation of two crocodiles smacking Paul McNamee back and forth for a few sets. And then eating him. Sound harsh? Ok, perhaps it is. Well, if not McNamee, how about an Optus phone that has failed to last as long as the contract to which it was affixed? At least in that particular case, there'd be no danger of running out of balls...